No seriously, who am I? Other than a mum, who am I?
That's exactly how I feel of late and I hate it. I was scrolling through my Instagram looking at my OLD profile, the pre baby and all party one, and somewhere along the line I've lost me. I've become just a mum. Now in no way am I saying that is a bad thing, not at all, but I miss me.
I used to be all about getting my hair done on the regular, extensions, tan, lashes, nails etc and it wasn't the home type either. I would travel to ACTUAL salons and get this shit done. Sit there reading trashy magazines while sipping on a cappuccino and saying things like ' OMG, I know, what a bitch' and 'I just want heaps of body and a blow-dry that will last me the next 2 days'.
Now it's a quick self tan in a can while the baby sleeps (if she doesn't sleep longer than 2 hours I am screwed), home manicures which consist of some cocoa butter and a 60 second nail polish (because let's be honest, you need a quick dry...that waiting 30 minutes for the colour to dry is long gone babe), strip lashes if I can be bothered (and have a spare pair floating around or stuck to the mirror), washing my hair the night before and then a quick fashionable, chíc messy bun (jokes, it's neither fashionable or chíc, it's more 'I haven't slept in 3 days and this is the best I could do'). If I can set the bebe down real quick, I might be able to run the straightener through it but c'mon, that's a rare thing!
I have friends message me asking what to do and where to go for their hair, tan etc and I secretly hate it. I am jealous. I want to get my hair down and sit in the salon doing nothing for 5 hours while drinking HOT coffee and reading a WHOLE magazine. These are only little things but shit, to have a whole day to do this without packing the whole bloody house, oh what an amazing thing to be able to do.
I have my hens weekend in 2 weeks and you know what I most excited about?? Sleep. Uninterupted sleep. It will be like' woooooooo cocktails and bed wool yeah!!! can't wait'.
My little bebe is teething at the moment (two at once, isn't she lucky?), and the poor little bug is in so much pain. There is no sleep in this house, there are lots of tears (from both of us... I don't think I HAVEN'T cried in 4 days). I want to take her pain away as it breaks my heart to see her like this, but most definitely no sleep. The bags under my eyes are not Hermés, no, they are more like K Mart school bags and my sanity is thin, like that first bit of ice that forms on the Ice Cube tray (where you think it's done and a solid piece of ice then BOOM, breaks and you are left with a half filled tray cause you stuffed it up and misjudged your time)...
I don't feel like the pre baby Krystle, not at all, I feel like a mum. Someone I actually never thought I would be (but was secretly knew I was destined for). I love being Willow's mum so much, it is an amazing and rewarding job. For now I will be ok with tan in a can and messy mum buns, that's how she knows me, how she knows I am her mum and I am ok with that!